In addition to the higher rate of selecting an alcoholic partner, ACOAs are also more likely to experience the symptoms of trauma. Dr. Tian Dayton, a clinical psychologist, reports the impact of this trauma on a child and how the environment in which these children grow up directly reflects the major factors contributing to PTSD. These factors include the feeling of being unable to escape from the pain, being at risk in the family, and being frightened in a place that should be safe. While it is not an officially recognized mental health disorder, Peter Pan Syndrome is used to describe adults who hold on to childlike behaviors and having difficulty taking on responsibility and accountability.
Healing from Adult Child Syndrome at Newport Institute
At Newport Institute, we view young adult mental health conditions as symptoms of underlying trauma and attachment wounds. Therefore, our treatment model directly addresses adult child syndrome, uncovering and healing both past trauma and its impact in the present. Many ACoAs have trouble both forming and maintaining healthy relationships,15 especially romantic ones. Growing up without being able to trust others or even rely on your parent for consistent affection may make you fear intimacy in adulthood. And if your relationship model growing up involved somebody addicted to alcohol, you may not have a good blueprint for what a healthy relationship looks like.
Children create an understanding of their environment with the psychological equipment they have at any particular stage of development. Small children may come up with fantastical, magical solutions that are the product of their immature minds. They may learn to bend the truth, for example, to make it less frightening, creating “reasons” for their parent’s erratic behavior that are less threatening than the truth. For example, they may think, Daddy yells at me more because I am his favorite. As adolescents, they have a greater ability to perceive reality but are still in the throes of their own individuation.
Difficulties in Relationships
ACoAs are up to 10 times more likely to become addicted to alcohol13 themselves. Having a father addicted to alcohol increases both men’s and women’s risk of alcoholism while growing up with a mother addicted to alcohol tends to increase women’s risk more than men’s. And ACoAs are also at greater risk for addiction to drugs other than alcohol. Many ACoAs seek recognition from the outside world for their achievements as an escape from the dysfunction at home. When you don’t receive consistent affection just for being you, you grow up feeling worthy only because of your accomplishments. And especially when you’re young, the only parts of your life in your control are often your performance in school or extracurriculars.
Take Back Control of Your Life in Rehab
- As an adult, though, you can learn to manage and change specific behaviors that no longer help you, which can improve your overall well-being, quality of life, and relationships with others.
- Pursuing healing through rehab or therapy can help you develop a truer sense of self-love.
- If you are struggling with fears surrounding abandonment or low self-esteem from your childhood, it’s important to seek mental health support to heal from these issues so you can lead a healthier, happier quality of life.
- Or you may have witnessed them become extremely emotionally volatile while drinking.
- Consequently, the traumatic memories can be difficult to access through reflective talking alone (Sykes Wylie, , 2004).
- Depression, anxiety, personality disorders, and other mental health disorders are common in adult children of alcoholics, who are at increased risk for behavioral health issues.
Discover the key symptoms, underlying causes, and treatment strategies to address this condition effectively. These characteristics are caused by the fact that you never knew when, or if, your parents would be emotionally available to you. From experience you knew your needs would not be met until the drinking episode and any accompanying crises were over.
Common Symptoms of Adult Child Syndrome
According to one study, 85% of reported child abuse cases involve alcohol.2 Child neglect is also common. Researched, fact-checked and transparent articles and guides that offer addiction and mental health insight from experts and treatment professionals. Join our global mission of connecting patients with addiction and mental health treatment.
Basic intelligence is a factor in resilience along with the child’s own organic structure. Some children seem better equipped by nature to cope with adverse circumstances in spite of their gender or position in the family. Though it is virtually impossible to separate the combined effects of nature and nurture, there can be organic reasons that can influence a child’s ability to cope with adversity effectively. Having a parent with AUD doesn’t automatically mean you’ll develop the condition yourself. That said, you are four times more likely to develop it than someone who doesn’t have a parent with AUD.
You become so accustomed to doing everything on your own that it may be scary to lean on someone else for your needs. And even when you do start to rely on others, it’s very common for ACoAs to fear abandonment.7 The volatility of your childhood makes it difficult to believe that love can be consistent. Parental alcohol addiction increases a child’s risk of sexual and physical abuse.
Adult child syndrome originally referred to the experiences and symptoms of children aged 18 and up who grew up in a home where one or more parents or caregivers suffered from alcohol use disorder. However, it is now used to describe adult children who grew up in any type of dysfunctional or abusive home. Adult children of alcoholic trauma syndrome, or an adult child adult children of alcoholic trauma syndrome of an alcoholic (ACoA), as the term suggests is someone who grew up with a parent(s) who struggled with alcoholism.
- The child learns to stand there in the situation that ensnares them, but on the inside they flee, they dissociate.
- Externalizing adult children were more likely to be diagnosed with substance use disorder and antisocial personality disorder.
- Not only do you have a genetic predisposition, but you may have tried to cope with an absent parent in your life by abusing drugs.
- Older siblings can also trap younger siblings in this power imbalance that can become part of a trauma bond.
- Broad swings between states of emotional intensity and numbing are part of the natural trauma response.
As children living with parental addiction, CoAs often learn not to tell the truth about what they see going on around them. For the family that is in denial about the progressive illness of addiction in its midst, telling the truth can be ostracizing. Family members can quickly turn against the one who tries to make the growing problems of dysfunction and addiction evident.
Whichever camp you’re in, it’s important to remember that whether or not you develop issues from your childhood is not a reflection of your character. Entering an intimate relationship of one-to-one or group therapy can seem like a “really bad idea” to the ACoA who has learned that people cannot necessarily be trusted. In addition to a higher likelihood of mental health issues, adult children often struggle with intimate relationships. Because they did not learn healthy relationship skills from parents or caregivers, they may have difficulty communicating effectively and expressing their needs to their partner. Moreover, the fear of abandonment may make it hard for them to trust others and be vulnerable with them. Adult children tend to replicate their childhood environment by choosing a partner who has substance use or mental health disorders.
There are several different signs and symptoms of PTSD and trauma exhibited by adult children of alcoholics. Similar to PTSD, any one symptom can be problematic and can have a negative impact on the quality of life for the individual. Oftentimes, the more dysfunctional a family becomes, the more isolated it becomes from other families. Having somewhere to go that feels safe and offers a different model of how to live can have a lasting, positive impact on a child that counters the effects of growing up with trauma. ACoAs often talk about grandparents’ houses, spending time at the neighbor’s, the house of a friend or relative, or a job where they could regain their balance and recognize that the world is full of options. When you don’t learn how to regulate your emotions, you might find it more difficult to understand what you’re feeling and why, not to mention maintain control over your responses and reactions.